That’s my seat!

Have you noticed how some members always sit in the same seat at your meetings?  In fact maybe you are one of those people.  Now I’m not talking Leadership Team here, I’m talking about the member who, no matter what, sits in the same place every single week, month after month, probably more out of habit than anything else.  And you might also be thinking: so what?

There might even be a group of members who sit in the same places - a clique.  Now a clique can be a good thing. After all it is a group of ‘persons who interact with each other more regularly and intensely than others in the same setting’ (dictionary definition), just like a Power Team.  However, both sitting in the same place every week, and being part of a clique, can be bad for both you and your chapter.  Let me explain why.

But first a short story. 

Part of your training as a BNI Director is to visit a chapter to get a feel for how you are going to help the chapters you will be looking after. You arrive very early, before even the Visitor Hosts, then sit at the back of the meeting, observing and taking notes.  These notes will then be discussed back in the training room.  Well on my first visit, long ago, the Leadership Team were already there setting up the room when we arrived.  They had a problem with members always sitting in the same seats and as a way of dealing with the challenge they were laying out the members' business cards where they wanted people to sit.  Then the most amazing thing happened; as the members arrived they found their business card and swapped it with the one in their usual seat.  So everything went back to normal!  As trainee Directors we couldn’t say anything; we just smiled and made our notes.

So, what’s my point?

Well, cliques can be bad for a number of reasons but I think the two main ones are; 1) some visitors are put off by the cliques and so won’t join your chapter, and 2) some new members discover the cliques after they join, find it hard to break into the groups, and end up leaving.  Both of these mean a loss of potential business to the chapter.

But, what about always sitting in the same seat and chatting with your friend.  How can that hurt?  Well I know members in chapters who have never spoken to all of the other members of their chapter.  Many of these same members complain about not getting enough referrals.  See a connection?  Unless you are at least attempting to build a relationship with your fellow members, getting to know them, like them, trust them, you may, and so may they, being missing out on potential business.

So, how about giving up your favourite seat next week and sitting next to someone new?  You just never know where it might lead!